That forgiveness is good for the soul.

That forgiveness is good for the soul.   "FORGIVENESS" a big word for anyone to understand or even accomplish. Once you have learned to forgive your soul is cleansed and a thousands of pounds have been lifted from you. Believe me it is so great for you and life changing. What got me through my separation and the preparation of him leaving our home of 20 years was a lot of prayer and a few great friends that helped me to understand and support me. God also put a couple of special people in my life to help me along with the process. But my biggest supporter were my own children, they are the best. I could not of made it with out them. Their Nana would tell me why do you tell them so much, why are they so involved. I remember telling her they needed to know and understand that their lives were going to change and it was not going to be easy. OUR LIVES.
A very good friend asked me if I still loved him and I told him yes I did, I was willing to try anything. He shared that if I did then I needed to do this. When I was ready to hear the truth because a man knows if he still loves you or not and I had to be ready for his response. And the day and time came when I was trying to tell him that no matter what we can make it work if you still love me and he said that he couldn't tell me right now. I insisted because he would've been able to tell me yes or no. Well he said some horrible words and said no. So from that day forward it was about the children. A few months later with my heart so heavy with pain I found myself praying and asking The Lord to help me to forgive because I could no longer have this pain. I asked God with my whole heart to help me forgive and to pray for, to be able to. When that special moment happened, the most beautiful warm feeling past through me and I felt at peace. God taught me the importance of Forgiveness and how cleansing it is for your soul. Now I can talk about him and have no anger. I shared with my children and I am trying show them the importance of life. Life how hard it is to understand. 

That is what I am trying to teach my children.

That is what I am trying to teach my children. Teach them you should respect others as you want them to respect you. To get along with one another including your family and extended family. To love one another even when they have broken your heart. Now that is very hard when your own heart was broken by your own husband. They now realize that love is not forever. I try to tell them that they are right, that maybe it's one step closer to your true Soul Mate, your true love. That it's a step towards happiness.  I know it sounds like a fairy tale however if you don't believe in dreams then what is left to trust. 
I still believe that a man should open the doors, come and meet your parents, ask permission to take you out on a date and be respectful to wait until that special moment in time. My kids tell me that I am old fashion and have old views. But those views have helped me and molded me, who I am now. I am not perfect and I do have some things that I am not proud of but with the help of our Lord I have been able to forgive myself and others. Forgiveness, that is very hard to accomplish but possible. That's what I'm trying to teach my children that forgiveness is good for the soul.   

To have faith and trust in how you feel and to love one another

To have faith and trust in how you feel and to love one another
That is a very strong word "FAITH".  A word that means so much but can be forgotten in an instinct. As I was growing up I had no FAITH because I didn't believe in myself and I trusted no one. Yet I had friends but not ones that I can say that we have remained since elementary, junior high or even high school. You know those friendships that regardless what has happen in life you are still friends, till the end. Don't get me wrong I have friends now and very good friends but it is hard to teach your children about friendship when they come and go.
But I came to grips with something, that friendships are placed in your life for a reason. That people are placed in your life at the time of your needs. You are to learn from them, cry with them, grow with them and learn to forgive with them. That the higher power knows who are your real friends and it's not only friends, it can be your extended family too as your friends. So don't fret because people come in and out of your life it just means that the  friendship is done for now. It just means that it's time to move on to a next chapter. 
That is what I am trying to teach my children. Which is very hard for them to understand because todays times are so different from when I was growing up and times are so advance beyond.

How do you lose yourself as a women, wife, mother and lover?

How do you lose yourself as a women, wife, mother and lover? That is a question that I have been asking myself. As you are becoming a women you go through many changes mentally and physically. As a wife you learn, grow, give, and offer. As a mother you forget about yourself and as a lover you please your mate. When do you make time for yourself? But yet you are so happy to do so to make sure they are taken care of before yourself and that is just instinct and learned. 
As I find myself single, I reflect on my pass and realize that the problems where there all along. That I didn't want to except them. 
Now I look back and hope that from my mistakes I may be able to teach my girls and son the importance of loving yourself and trusting your gut feelings. To have faith and trust in how you feel and to love one another regardless of faith, color or race.

Finding a way to go on with life.

 Life? Did anyone tell you that life was going to be so hard. Well as I was growing up life wasn't as bad. However, now that I'm an adult well, it's something else. Because when I fell in love and got married I believed that it was going to be forever. No one ever told me that it was going to be so hard and painful when it ended. No one ever warned me that it was going to be a lot of work. Now that I'm single parent it's even more challenging. How do you show and tell your children to have faith in family, love and marriage. To trust that LOVE does exist, that marriage is so sacred, even when their own parents didn't work out. 
How do you prepare to be a single parent and women?
How do you lose yourself as a women, wife, mother and lover?